Wednesday, June 02, 2010

Noticed while on the NYT weddings site

1. She looks like she's playing dress-up in her mother's clothes.

2. Therefore for her to be trying to look alluring is slightly Jon-Benet Ramsey.

3. Also, there is such a thing as being over-matched.

That is all.

A bit of veiled conceit: Chaudhary-Warren*

Sometimes, an announcement appears to be written in English, but needs a little translation to actually make sense. Witness the mild hipster** love of Dimple Chaudhary and Previn Warren.

I don't have the energy to lay this out properly, and these two don't really deserve any filleting. It's not like they cheated on their previous spouses together then ran off to Italy. Instead, I'll just reprint sections of the vows, along with my asides and translation.

In November 2005, Dimple Chaudhary was happily single, but wasn’t against getting her feet wet, that is, leaving before breakfast.

“I’m always struck by her vivaciousness and good humor,” (her friend) Ms. Larson said, "I also plan on remaining her friend, so what else would I say?"

The next morning, while going for coffee in Park Slope, Ms. Larson saw a good-looking fellow across the street. They made eye contact, but he wasn't into her and so they kept walking. Next thing she knew, she was running toward him. “Sir! Excuse me! I have this friend. ... ”

This section is the reason I wanted to write about this announcement:
Mr. Warren, who was living in Park Slope, gave his number to Ms. Larson, who immediately called Ms. Chaudhary, who also lived in the neighborhood.

Her first thought? “Ax murderer,” Ms. Chaudhary said of her friend’s catch. “It was adorable that she ran after him, but you never know. He was just some guy!”

Her second thought? He said he was 23 — three years her junior. “In New York there’s this idea of prolonged youth,” she said, noting that most men of that age “want to date lots of girls, and I felt I wanted to build something with someone.”

Ms. Chaudhary spent days weighing the pros and cons of calling. “I finally decided it was one of those neighborhood-y things,” she said. “I mean, it’s not like something that would happen in Midtown.”

The reason I wanted to blog this vows was because this part of the announcement doesn't make any sense.

1. Ax[e] murderer, who lives in Park Slope? I'm not a New Yorker, but my impression is that Park Slope is basically the nicest neighborhood in New York, if not the U.S. People on the street there are liable to be quality, not axe murderers. There is also somewhat of a man-woman thing here. Guy approaches a girl on the street - could be weird (but it happens in NYTWCA fairly often***). Girl approaches guy on the street, he's liable to be receptive. Girl's friend approached a guy on the street, has spoken to him, so he's pre-vetted as a non-obvious axe murderer (and is there any other kind).

2.Prolonged youth nonsense... eh. One can figure that out.

3. Days deciding? Maybe.

4. Neighborhoody thing? I suppose 34th and Park isn't quite midtown. This seems over-determined. Read on:

“I’m glad you called,” he said when he answered. They arranged to meet at a Prospect Heights dive bar of her choosing.

Here's what I'm thinking. She decided to blow him off completely. Then, she got drunk, started complaining to Ms. Larson, and Ms. Larson called the groom on the bride's cell phone and put the phone in her hand. That would explain the delay, and the preposterous post-facto reasons. It also puts this in a much more interesting context:
She dialed, praying it would go to voice mail.

*: Veiled Conceit concept, or at least blogging, originated by Zach of

**: "But, p.e.", you say, "how do you know they're hipsters?" I'll tell you. I induce it from the following. 1. They live in Brooklyn, capital of American Hipsterdom. 2. Unnatural fascination with dive bars. 3. Explicit disowning of 'tatooed 30 year olds who've spent the decade perfecting being 21,' i.e. hipsters (as hipsters will always disavow being hipsters, often on preposterous and narrow grounds). 4. Pizza as an after-proposal meal. 5. For that matter proposing in LAX terminal 5. 6. Vintage Checker cab instead of limo. 6 1/2. Wrote own stupid vows. (does not really count, everyone does it). 7. Guy with whiskers, girl who likes guys with whiskers (may not really count - cultural thing? am _I_ racially profiling?). 8. Two 'funny' mentions of racial profiling within a single short entry (Is this really a hipster behavior? It's extraordinarily preening and annoying, so, YES). 9. The bride makes pottery.

***: Since I'm trying to not infringe, I didn't quote the bit from the begining about flagging down a mate like you flag down a cab, but the choice seems unfortunate given the cab-flagging-driven romance featured 3 weeks previous.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

A bit of Veiled Conceit* Darria Long- Bryce Gillespie

[Caption: The only time in the last three years that this power couple have been motionless in the same room]
They met in medical school, which is common enough. But how?

"He saw her sing a spoof of 'He Had it Coming,' from 'Chicago.'"** Just so we're clear on what he's implying, she probably looked like this:

[Caption: Her mouth is singing an in joke about some professor. The rest of her is communicating more universally]
He thought she was unattainable since, as a 4th year, she was going to end up working in a hospital far from where he was, and that her having an extra degree would make it difficult for them to relate.

Like the other 4th years, she did vanish, but instead of going to a residency, she showed up two years later with a different extra degree.***

They formally met in an anatomy refresher course, though one hopes that memories of the Cell Block Tango kept Bryce warm in the cold Rochester night. Like all medical students, she had apparently forgotten anatomy immediately after leaving it. There was a cadaver lab that they could go to, but she thought it was 'cold' and 'creepy,' so she wanted backup. Really? A 27 year old with a bachelors and an advanced degree that's already been through anatomy is scared of cadaver lab / doesn't own a sweater? Cynics in the audience will say she was fishing for someone more handsome than Bryce to show up, but other cynics (and me) will say that, like all medical students, she wanted to avoid doing real work in her 4th year, so Darria sent an e-mail out asking if people actually wanted to do this lab thing.

"I always joke that he had me at the shoulder joint dissection." She says. In reality he just kept offering to show her his bones until she fell for it. There's also a cute story about him pumping gas for her because it was too cold for her to do it herself. That's cute, but it misses a key point - that was 4th year medical school He's now a 4th year resident in Boston, and she's a 3rd year resident in New Haven****. What happened in the last 4 years? Why aren't they in the same schools? Did distance keep them together, or apart? In the heat of residency, is it better to be 'dating' someone in another state where they can't trouble your sleep? Who kept the "Cell Block Tango" outfit?

I'm swooning... must be the formaldehyde!

*: In immitation of Zach at the now defunct

**: Technically "The Cell Block Tango," but these people don't have to be precise, right?

***: Though not one that tends to socially separate possessors from non-possessors the way the MD does.

****: I'm not trying to conceal that the one is at Harvard and the other at Yale, I'm just trying to reveal distances.